Whatever it is that matters most to you, it is vitally important that first and foremost you take care of you...
Yes, believe it or not, it is OK to put yourself and your needs at the top of the list. Being on the bottom of the list leaves us worn out, run down and no good to anyone. We don't usually get fat, sick and depressed by taking care of our own needs. And, if we are waiting for others to take care of us, we may wait forever. It's our job!! In order to be a great mom, lover, friend, sister, daughter... you have to be the best you you can be! And I have to be the best me I can be. Which means I may have to tell you "NO" occasionally. Don't get mad- Be Supportive!
Balance is my mantra, but I don't get it right 100% of the time, maybe only 75% of the time, but I'm making progress. And for a complete "people-pleaser" like me, it's a real journey of balancing both my needs and yours.
No one likes a martyr- or a selfish b-word!- So instead of being either one of those extremes, be smart and put yourself first in a balanced, healthy way!!